then kissed a boy during a game of rotation of the bottle, Dominic Crouch, 15, jumped to his death. Her suicide prompted his father to campaign against homophobic bullying. But the tragedy of the family does not end here
before May 18, 2010, the ducks were seen as a happy family. It is not unusual, perhaps, but comfortable enough to enjoy the company of others. The arguments were rare. They laughed a lot.
above the fireplace in the living room of his modest home is a picture of four of them on holiday in the Lake District. It was taken on a cloudy day and are stacked in waterproof hiking boots with a smile in preparation for the click of the camera timer. Paola, a small woman with delicate features with dark hair and eyes, is at the center, flanked by his two teenage children, Julia and Santo Domingo. In the back, arms outstretched to encircle their young, is the father, Roger, his only expression of the obvious pride.
"We used to laugh all the time - we were very strong and loud," said Paola, sitting on a big blue end of the sofa back against a wall of the room. His daughter, Julia TODAY 'Today 20, sits cross-legged next to her, that do not meet the eyes of his mother. Instead, she played with a series of colorful bracelets, arm still around as a reminder of the various music festivals, it was until last summer.
"Now it's different," says Paola, watching his daughter. "You feel you should not be happy. I am aware of that. If I walk the dog and it's a good day, crisp puts a smile on my face, I fear that people look at me and think, "Oh, well, OK it, then."
The picture on the mantel is one of the first things Paola wants to see me when I walk in your door. She wants, I think, to show what a normal family, who were then, and how, that day in May two years ago, a catastrophic sequence of events is launched that I leave here, two women on a sofa in an empty house, not wanting to know the look in case they start to cry.
May 18, 2010, Sunday committed suicide by jumping from the roof of a six-storey block of flats near their school in Cheltenham. He was 15. In the note he left his family, hastily scrawled in black ink lines inclined, writes: "Dear family, I am so sorry for what I have intimidated me a lot recently and I had a lot of
. aa composed by me shit is not true. "In the study, nearly six months later, it was learned that Dominic had kissed a boy on a school trip to a part of the rotation of the bottle. A group of Year 9 students had been in a residential trip to the Forest of Dean, organized by the school - and St. Edward in a private school, Catholic. Males were housed in St. Briavels Castle - a 13th century building that now serves as a hostel - and a gentle night had gathered in a field to play the game
At the time, seemed a little more than an example of teenage revelry. However, some participants recorded the game on their mobile phones and is believed to have been subsequently broadcast images, among other friends. Domingo, who was dyslexic and found it difficult to give a quick answer, apparently became the target of some jokes when he returned to St. Edward after the trip. Although these jokes were described by one student as "no more jokes in school," which seemed to be quite painful on Sunday left three suicide notes, which are all mentioned harassment.
When contacted, Peter Goatley, president of St. Edward's administration, said: "After Sun's death, police interviewed several students, including several suggested by Mr. and Mrs.. Crouch found no evidence of the cathedral. were intimidated, and did not the coroner, who also heard extensive testimony about the life of Sun beyond the school. "Mr. Goatley said position of the school is that "harassment of any kind is not, nor will be tolerated" and that its anti-bullying policy specifically mentioned homophobic bullying and has for many years. According to Mr Goatley, that there was "clear evidence" that if something was said Sunday morning of his death that could have caused discomfort enough to kill.
For Father Dominic, however, there is no doubt that his son was the victim of homophobic bullying. In the months that followed the death of his son, Roger was devoted to campaign on behalf of his son. He toured the country speaking to school, meet with MPs and councilors in writing of the need to adopt a "zero tolerance". general is a complex problem: according to a 2007 report by Stonewall, the lobbying organization for gays and lesbians, 65% of lesbians, gays and bisexual pupils have experienced bullying , as did three quarters of young gay men who attend religious schools. Even if gay pupils are not direct targets, they are "learning in an environment where homophobic language and comments are very common." Ninety-eight percent of gay youth hear the expression "it is so gay "or" You're so gay "at school - and anecdotal evidence suggests that the terminology is used freely in workplaces across the country
StonewallA report in 2009 revealed that eight out of 10 secondary teachers and two in five primary school teachers reported hearing homophobic slurs like "fag" or "dyke", "queer" and "fag ". Ninety percent of secondary teachers had seen children being harassed homosexuals.
In a speech at an education conference following the death of Dominic, Roger Crouch the assumption that "joke" Sunday ear could have been "just a way to make fun of a boy who was vulnerable "and presented a series of measures to ensure that schools have undertaken such actions seriously. According to Julia, the campaign was" Dad how to cope. "It has been determined, said Paola, the voice of the child "should be heard" and their efforts led to him was named "Hero of the Year" at a ceremony held by Stonewall last November.
"It was really exciting to see how he and Paola have tried to make sense both of what had happened and the future," said Ben Summerskill, Stonewall Chief Executive , who worked closely with the couple. "It would be very easy for them just to go immediately and can not think about how to help change the lives of others.
"We do not know if Dominic was gay or not, but a sad reality for many similar cases is that parents tend to go in complete denial, even when there is evidence significant only for why his son committed suicide. In these cases, parents are going through all the emotions of discovering that your child may have been gay, and the trauma of losing a child. "Yet despite showing Roger outward force, which was, says Summerskill, "a broken heart - and I use such language with caution."
On November 28, 2011, just weeks after receiving the award from Stonewall, Roger Crouch hanged himself in the garage of the family home. Your emotions were beaten, their energy was exhausted, she could go. He was 55. The funeral director came to remove the body was the same man who organized the funeral Sunday.
When she says that Paola, shakes his hands more tightly around his coffee cup. "When he died Domi, who was like a black box is opened in your head," she says. "It seemed the beginning of the end ... I do not intend to kill Roger. I think that the intention to stop the pain ... I think I fell into a dark and very, very badly. "
By Paola and Julia, the pain of losing a father, brother, husband and son is so raw, it's almost a tangible presence. They are described as "shell shock" and the evil day by day, to give meaning to what happened in barely 21 months.
"Time does funny things when you are grieving," says Paola. "I do not feel it at the normal rate."
"They do not realize much of the day," said Julia. "Just blurs into one." She stares at me. "I could not even tell you what day it is. "
When you talk to your family and friends this Sunday was like, there are certain words that appear over and over again. "Cheeky" is one of them. "Soft", "class" and "hysterically funny" are there too. Ty Griffiths, a friend from elementary school, said: "I do not think I ever had been broken, it is always fun things to laugh or do something so spontaneous that we all laughed with him.". Calum Wood, who knew Sunday's three years old, remembers him as "a little man with a big heart" who loved climbing trees and walking barefoot whenever possible. "There were hand and foot along the marks on the walls of their room in which shimmy along like a monkey," said Calum.
Julia, her sister, who is studying history at the University of Leeds, remember that no two of them argued. "It seems really stupid," she said, unable to stop the tears, "but I used to play on the PlayStation game called Crash Bandicoot and he was so good in this area has had very good taste on television and film -. Loved
The Inbetweeners
andAvatar
. I talk to him because of things that he was always very enthusiastic about the things interesting. "
Dominic went to school as usual on the day of his death, without any suggestion that there was something wrong. The previous day he had returned from his trip to St. Briavels art. Both Paola and Julia I remember being very happy when he returned, full of stories about how he helped a friend who has suffered an epileptic seizure. Victoria Widdows, a classmate of Dominique, who was on the trip, recalled: "It seemed the happiest he has never seen any signs of discomfort seem Dominican in his last days, he was a quiet boy and sometimes he liked to keep things to himself, .. but if you ever saw him look sad, I always wondered if it was OK. " What happened that morning, after Julia left his brother at the door of the school, was skipping classes to Sunday afternoon and headed for a building of housing close around 13:15. Once inside, he went upstairs and, despite being only 5 feet 6 inches tall, seems to have jumped to the roof hatch to open and access the roof. At 14:22, he sent a message of notification of the 999 emergency services of your situation and your intention to commit suicide. He received an automated reply, saying. "A message has been sent 999 emergency No services have been alerted You must be registered to use this service.".
How have this message from a child in distress and 15 years, dyslexic? Paola does not like to think. "If the school just called me and told me he was not there," she said. "I called and called and called [the phone]. I wish I had had this opportunity. "
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